Tuesday, June 8, 2010

N00b Moose!

Hans Jørgen Olsen (destined to be either a death metal singer or a golfer), a 12 year old Norwegian boy defended his sister from a moose attack using tactics and strategies he learned from playing World of Warcraft. Suck it Guild Wars!
(May not have actually happened like this)

The Olsen children were taking a shortcut through the woods on their way to school, apparently they live in the same town as Hansel and Gretel, when they came across an angry moose. The moose charged at the tiny Scandinavian children, and to save his sister Hans waved his arms and taunted the moose to distract it and have it come after him instead. A tactic that WoW players use to lure monsters away from weak or injured party members. The moose charged Hans and head-butted him in the back, with most of the force being absorbed by his backpack, which was probably full of reindeer steak and Dimmu Borgir CD's. The little viking then played possum after being knocked down by the beast. This excerpt from Topless Robot explains.

'The idea to play dead, he had learned from playing online role-playing game World of Warcraft. “When you reach level 30, you learn a trick called the ‘fake death’. That’s what I did – I pretended I was dead, and then the moose lost interest,” says the brave 12-year-old.'

Congrats Hans for having chrome plated and newly descended testicles that Odin would be jealous of. Sadly I don't think that any American WoW nerds would have the athleticism or quick thinking that Hans "Elg Manndrapere" Olsen showed out in the wilderness. The only possible way to find out is release some onto a game reserve and see how they fair.

Let's just be thankful that he didn't play Everquest. Yeah, I'm saying Everquest sucks.

Currently Listening To: Black River Killer -- Blitzen Trapper

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